Cheetah Piss Strain

Is Cheetah Piss indica or sativa?

Cheetah Piss is a balanced sativa, and what you get is a clean, lifted headspace without much weight to it.

The citrus is the loudest thing in the jar, which is worth saying early because the name sets a different expectation. What you get is bright and sweet.

All three parents are dessert or citrus strains, which is why the sweetness carries and the funk sits underneath rather than on top.

Daytime is the slot. Cheetah Piss keeps you upright and clear, and it’s a poor idea once you’d rather start slowing down.

Cheetah Piss strain effects

Cheetah Piss gives you a clean, lifted headspace with very little physical weight.

The lift comes first and it’s bright rather than sharp. Your mood picks up, things feel easier, and you skip the jittery quality that harder sativas can bring.

Your head stays organized underneath it. Thinking gets a little quicker without scattering, so this works for anything you actually need to finish.

You won’t feel much in your body, and that’s the design. If the point is to wind down, this is close to the wrong end of our menu.

Flower is slower off the mark than a vape, so wait ten minutes before going back. Cheetah Piss is strong enough that the gap matters here.

The effect runs a few hours and tapers cleanly, so there’s nothing to sleep off afterwards.

Good for: mornings, work, errands, company in daylight, and anyone who wants a sativa with real strength behind it. Bad for: the back half of an evening, anything meant to settle you, and bedtime.

Cheetah Piss terpenes

Cheetah Piss leads with beta-caryophyllene, then d-Limonene and humulene. That’s the profile in our Cheetah Piss flower, and a panel run elsewhere will come back different.

What Cheetah Piss tastes and smells like

Cheetah Piss tastes sweet and citrus-forward with a sharp funky edge underneath.

The citrus is the front and it’s properly bright, closer to lemonade than to lemon peel, which comes straight down the Lemonnade side of the family.

Sweetness sits behind it from the two dessert parents, and that’s what stops the citrus from being thin.

The funk is the reason for the name and it’s the last thing you notice rather than the first. It’s savory and a little sharp, and it gives the whole profile a character that most citrus strains don’t have.

If you like bright and sharp, this is one of the better examples we carry. If you want dessert flavors with nothing challenging in them, the edge here will be more than you wanted.

How strong is Cheetah Piss?

Cheetah Piss is strong, and it sits at the top of our range alongside Jealousy.

Cheetah Piss flower usually tests somewhere between 23 and 30% THC, which is about as high as flower realistically gets. We sell the flower itself, so that range applies to your eighth rather than to a plant upstream of a cart.

The clarity is what makes the number easy to miss. Because there’s so little body weight, nothing signals to you that you’ve had enough, and people misjudge this one for exactly that reason.

Start small and give it ten minutes. The half-gram pre-roll minis exist so you can meet a strain like this without committing to a full joint.

If you’ve found sativas underwhelming and gone looking for something with more behind it, this is the answer on our menu.

What is Cheetah Piss crossed with?

Cheetah Piss is a three-way cross of Lemonnade, Gelatti and London Poundcake 97, and two of those trace to strains we sell.

Lemonnade is the citrus and most of what you taste first. That side is where the lemonade quality comes from, and it’s the reason this reads as bright rather than heavy.

Gelatti brings dessert sweetness and some of the structure. It’s a Gelato-family plant, which is a background you’ll recognize from half our menu.

London Poundcake 97 is the third, and we sell London Pound Cake as its own strain, so you can taste the family resemblance directly if you want to.

Nine of ten published accounts agree on those three parents, which is unusually good agreement. None of them says which parent was the mother, and on a three-way cross that’s the detail that would actually explain the result.

Cheetah Piss, Funky Kitty, and the animal names

Cheetah Piss is also sold as Funky Kitty, and that’s the same plant under a name shops can print.

The alias exists because the original is difficult for a lot of retailers, and you’ll see it on menus where the real name would be a problem. Nothing about the plant changes.

Cheeta Piss with one T turns up constantly, and so do a handful of other misspellings. Every one of them is somebody looking for this plant.

There’s a whole shelf of animal-named strains that get searched alongside this one, and most of them share nothing with it but the naming convention. The name is a marketing decision rather than a family marker.

Whichever name brought you here, what we sell is the Lemonnade cross: bright citrus, dessert sweetness, and a savory edge underneath.

What is Cheetah Piss good for?

Cheetah Piss is for a daytime that needs you sharp and could do with being more enjoyable.

The useful thing here is the combination of real strength and no body weight. Most strains this potent slow you down somewhere, and this one doesn’t.

Work suits it, and so does anything social in daylight. You stay articulate and you stay quick, which isn’t always true of a strain at this percentage.

It also suits anyone who’s built a tolerance and stopped feeling much from milder sativas. Cheetah Piss will land where most daytime strains have stopped landing.

Where Cheetah Piss is the wrong pick: evenings, winding down, a first time with cannabis, and anyone who dislikes sharp or savory flavors.

Why is it called Cheetah Piss?

Cheetah Piss is named for the color of the flower rather than for anything about the smell.

The buds run pale and yellow-green with orange hairs through them, and somebody looked at that and made the obvious joke. The name stuck because names like that always do.

What it actually smells like is lemonade first, then sweetness from the dessert parents, with a savory edge underneath that’s closer to hops than to anything else.

The name is also why the alias exists. Plenty of retailers can’t print this on a menu or run an ad against it, so Funky Kitty does the job instead.

If the name has put you off, here’s the honest pitch: bright lemonade citrus, real sweetness, a savory finish, and one of the strongest sativas we sell.

Cheetah Piss compared to Durban Poison and Tropicana Cherry

Cheetah Piss, Durban Poison and Tropicana Cherry are three daytime strains we sell as flower, and they separate on what kind of sharp you want.

Durban Poison is the purest sativa of the three and the most upright. Sweet pine and licorice instead of citrus, with no body weight at all, and it’s the strongest morning strain on the menu.

Tropicana Cherry is the quiet one and the most focused. Stone fruit over cookie dough, less strength than Cheetah Piss carries, and better suited to a long stretch of concentration than to a fast start.

Short version: Durban Poison to wake up properly, Cheetah Piss when you want power with your clarity, Tropicana Cherry when the job needs you thinking for hours.

Cheetah Piss THCa flower and pre-rolls, and where to buy

We sell Cheetah Piss as flower and as pre-rolls, both THCa, from our nine-strain flower line.

THCa flower, from $45. An eighth of whole flower with the certificate covering your exact batch.

THCa pre-rolls, from $35. Five whole-flower joints in mini or regular, rolled from the same jars, and the cheaper way to meet the strain.

Flower is the right format here for a specific reason. The humulene and the funk both live in the aroma, and aroma is the first casualty of a cheap extraction.

We ship direct to most states, certificates are published before ordering opens, and the store locator will show you who stocks us nearby.

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Cheetah Piss FAQ